The List That’s Going to Win Adepticon!

Zhardsnark crop

Yo dawg, we heard you like Orks, so we put an Ork on your Ork….with a Grot on him!

Yeah, that’s right, like Babe Ruth, I’m pointing at the fences, suckas!

You heard it here first, Orks are gonna win Adepticon…my Orks!

If you have socks on, prepare to have them blown off! My Warboss straight up has a pirate hat on…that’s almost not even fair to my opponents. I may get a judge called on me when people see that.

Pirate Warboss Crop

Shiver me timbers, ye stinkin ummies!

Just look at him, he’s a little bad ass! But he’s not alone, I have an entire formation of Pirate Mega Nobz to go with him! Holy molly, it’s going to be an Orkpocalpyse up in Chicago!


Yar, we be da stompiest pirates!

They even have totally sweet rides to drive around in which will make all the other players so super jelly.

20150317_162203 20150317_162222

I almost feel bad bringing the heat like this, kinda unfair. But hey, an Ork’s gotta do what an Ork’s gotta do, ya know what I’m sayin?!

List Name: Da Best List, EVA!!

Detachment 1: Ork CAD


Zhardsnark Da Rippa

Warboss: Mega Armor, Da Lucky Stikk


Warbikers x 5: Nob, Klaw

Warbikers x 5: Nob, Klaw

Warbikers x 5: Nob, Klaw

Warbikers x 5: Nob, Klaw


Tankbustas x 10


Heavy Support:

Lootas x 15

Detachment 2: Da Bullyboyz, Pirate Style!

Mega Nobz x 5

Trukk: Ram

Mega Nobz x 5

Trukk: Ram

Mega Nobz x 5

Trukk: Ram


If your eyeballs didn’t melt out of your face from the experience of reading that miracle of list writing, then consider yourself lucky. It is quite simply, majestic.

As you can see, not only are there pirates, but bikers, too! I crapped my pants a little when I wrote that sentence: it contained too much awesome. Who can hope to withstand the combined power of Bikers AND Pirates? Those are forces so powerful, I think they are what really caused the destruction of the Old World.



So, I have like, no AA, but it’s not like their will be a million Flyrants at Adepticon or anything. Traktor Kannons would be rad, but my Boy Zhardsnark isn’t cool with them in the list, so I’ll just make up for it breaking the wings off of any Flyrant models I see when my opponent isn’t looking. Sorry, bruh!

I’m gonna win by doing it the way grandpa did: punching everything in front of me in the dingus.

So, if you’re unlucky enough to play me at Adepticon you may just want to give up and buy me a beer. I would be cool with that and it would save you from the potentially life ending shame that would come along with playing against a list this glorious.

See you all at Adepticon, WAAAGH!!


About Reecius

The fearless leader of the intrepid group of gamers gone retailers at Frontline Gaming!

51 Responses to “The List That’s Going to Win Adepticon!”

  1. Avatar
    iNcontroL March 18, 2015 12:06 am #

    Oh Reece.. oh silly lil Reece. It’s ok, Frankie and I will win and you can caddy for us after day 1. I will even let you get me water if you are really nice.

  2. Avatar
    iNcontroL March 18, 2015 12:06 am #

    jk 🙂 Fun list.. with the wacky missions maybe you can grab enough objectives to win too!

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 18, 2015 7:39 am #

      Lol, yeah, not going to win Adepticon unless my dice go white hot and I play like Bobby Fisher, just going for fun to see how well I can do with my Orks who are so much fun to play.

      • Avatar
        Jural March 18, 2015 10:39 am #

        Bobby Fisher also had a sneaky good dingus punch.

  3. Avatar
    DuhRuckus March 18, 2015 1:17 am #

    Reece may have just broke the game. Pirate bikers are AA and will steal your opponents girl.

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 18, 2015 7:38 am #

      I’ve seen it happen, wasn’t pretty! =P

  4. Avatar
    Calle March 18, 2015 3:54 am #

    I would really like to se an batrep with those orks! Seems to be fast and hard hitting 🙂

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 18, 2015 7:39 am #

      After Adepticon, you certainly will! Just got them done, yesterday, hahaha.

  5. Avatar
    greggles March 18, 2015 4:10 am #

    Reece!! So excited you are bringing orks!

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 18, 2015 7:42 am #

      Yeah, it’s going to be fun!

  6. Avatar
    Delevarius March 18, 2015 4:26 am #

    Yes ! The game is ON!
    Everything is better with pirates !

  7. Avatar
    DCannon4Life March 18, 2015 4:31 am #

    Bwahahahahaha! (Hah!) See you there. 🙂

  8. Avatar
    SimonW March 18, 2015 5:37 am #

    If Zhardsnark rams a vehicle with his tank shock, he comes into base to base contact with it. The rules say that if you’re btb with a vehicle you’re engaged with it…
    Nothing like ramming 36″ total in turn 1 for first blood with 4 str 10 attacks!

    • Avatar
      Logan March 18, 2015 7:06 am #

      But after the ram/tank shock, you have to make sure your model is 1″ away still if the unit/model is still there by either moving their unit/model or yours.

      • Avatar
        SimonW March 19, 2015 2:06 am #

        Actually the rule for ramming says that you stop in base contact. There are even rules that if you ram a walker with a tank then they can make melee attacks against you, so the same applies to Zahndrekh :)!

        • Avatar
          RoockieBoy March 20, 2015 12:43 pm #

          I’ve heard both sides. Those who say he can, and those who say he can’t. The rules actually say he can tank shock, “as if he was a vehicle”, but to ram, you have to actualy BE a vehicle…
          Or am I mistaken?

  9. Avatar
    CaptainA March 18, 2015 6:51 am #

    Good luck! Swing your bodies to the fences!

  10. Requizen
    Requizen March 18, 2015 7:03 am #

    Hope I get to play against this list, looks like a lot of fun!

  11. Avatar
    RyanL March 18, 2015 7:06 am #

    Worth splitting the Lootas into a few smaller units, since you’re not using the extra heavy support slots?

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 18, 2015 7:44 am #

      They will usually go with the Megaboss who will tank wounds for them and give them S&P so they can move around and shoot at full BS and with +1WS (Lucky Stikk), they aren’t bad in assault, either!

      • Avatar
        tag March 18, 2015 9:39 am #

        That makes sense, thought I figured he would ride with the Tankbustas to tank the wounds when their truck explodes.

        • Reecius
          Reecius March 18, 2015 10:08 am #

          Wounds are randomly assigned in an explosion this edition =(

          • Avatar
            Delevarius March 20, 2015 7:30 am

            srsly, how do you conduct this rule in tournaments ? ‘cos it seems so tedious to roll to allocation for each wound….

  12. Avatar
    Loopy March 18, 2015 7:49 am #

    Get some, Reece!

  13. Avatar
    z3n1st March 18, 2015 8:41 am #

    you had me at pirate…then you mentioned bikers and then

  14. Avatar
    Archon-Kalafex March 18, 2015 8:52 am #

    Let me see if I can say this without the earth breaking. You would be unstoppable with pirate biker (ninja!) Orks. But that would probably be immediate disqualification and result in people doing the time warp… again…!!!

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 18, 2015 10:08 am #

      Holy shit, how do I not have Nijas in there, too?!?! My fatal flaw.

      • Avatar
        Jural March 18, 2015 10:42 am #

        I think Snikrot could be a ninja. So could some of the imperial assassins, or Eldar/Dark Eldar/Harlequins.

        But do you really want to break the Internet?

  15. Jason
    Raw Dogger March 18, 2015 9:04 am #

    I love this list! It is going to take a lot of people by surprise, especially if you have first turn and they are unaware of how fast it is. You actually have a really good AA unit in the Lootas, since that is a potential 45 shots at St.7. Yeah you are hitting on 6’s but that’s slightly worse than what you would normally be hitting on. With that many S7 shots you will at least glance a flier to death each turn or make a Flyrant take a couple armor saves. Of course, you could just keep rolling 1’s for their number of shots, at which time you just keep drinking.

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 18, 2015 10:11 am #

      Yeah, lol, it will be good fun if I go first! The Bikers are actually not bad at AA either, as they each have 3 str5, twin-linked shots.

  16. Avatar
    SomeCanadian March 18, 2015 9:56 am #

    This needs to be your Warboss’ theme song:

  17. Avatar
    fluger March 18, 2015 9:58 am #

    Epic List is Epic. But, I’m really thinking you could’ve taken it up to 12 if you added Kommandos instead of Lootas and made them look like…NINJAS.

    NINJAS! PIRATES! AND BIKERS! Now THAT would be too much awesome to contain and everyone would’ve probably surrendered before you even rolled dice.

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 18, 2015 10:10 am #

      Dude, done deal for the next version! hahaha

  18. Avatar
    Jural March 18, 2015 10:43 am #

    So if you get 20-30 people to mimic you and bring this same list to Adepticon, I think it has a chance to win! And certainly the final round will be filled with drunk people talking like pirates.

    You might want to do a brightly colored Heldrake to sit on your shoulder as a Helparrot.

  19. Avatar
    gorkamorker March 18, 2015 1:25 pm #

    By raw you can use tractor cannons Zhardsnark wont let you have big guns and tractor cannons are mek guns lol.

  20. Avatar
    Corbeau March 18, 2015 1:38 pm #

    ARRRRR! Make them walk the plank reece!!!!
    (It would be a cool conversion on a truck 🙂 )

  21. jy2
    jy2 March 18, 2015 2:04 pm #

    So what are you going to call your army? You know, every tournament-winning army needs a nickname, like #lictorshame.

    How about Pirorks of the Kick-your-beans?

    • Avatar
      Eldarain March 18, 2015 3:54 pm #

      Waaagh Dickpunch!

    • Avatar
      Luke March 18, 2015 5:06 pm #

      Do you get to name the army before you win a tournament? I think I’d rather just be surprised by whatever Reece lays on us when he does win

  22. Avatar
    Crispy March 18, 2015 5:18 pm #

    haha best article! Good luck with the tourney.

    Loving the pirate warboss, might have to do something like that for my own, so I can also crap my pants everytime I stare at him.

  23. Avatar
    Frozocrone March 19, 2015 5:56 pm #

    Is there a reason those Lootas are in the same unit? Why would it be better than 3×5 man units?

    Still, this list is so good and awesome that I feel bad for everyone who plays against it 🙂

  24. Avatar
    CaptainBadtouch March 20, 2015 5:02 pm #

    How are lootas not AA? If it weren’t for your lucky stickness, they’d be almost as good at shooting flyboys as they are ground targets.

  25. Avatar
    JISU March 21, 2015 10:52 pm #

    Hahaha, Recce you did it. This list looks like ton of fun.

    I have a doubt … how do you select bikers as troops ? Aren´t they Fast troops?

    Thanks and Luck and a bottle of drum !!!

    • Reecius
      Reecius March 22, 2015 8:20 am #

      Thanks! And the bikes are troops due to Zardsnark.

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